Hiding in my car
watching you walk down the blvd
dirty white rag sits on top of your head to block out the sun
mumbling as you pass
I drop lower in my seat
I can feel the defeat
I know in that moment
I can’t save you
no human can
my head demands
jump out & tell him
this wont last forever
a couple weeks later
I got a call
word on the street
you no longer have a heartbeat
I rush to the place you were born
I felt this thorn and somehow you were about to be reborn
when I arrived you were a John Doe
I thought to myself
does anyone know
he has a mom & kids who love him
all the sounds & tubing
it felt like I was in a movie
the kind where the miracle happens
reminding myself not to be so dramatic
I have to be strong so that everyone else can follow along
a couple days later your mom decided to unplug
right before that she gave you a hug
told herself you’d be better with him
to this day no one wins
they both are convinced they sinned
incapable of accepting the end
because we have no control
spiraling out she just wont let go
as all the flowers around her wither
she hears a soft whisper
I did this
not you
he no longer blames you